Church this morning was the biggest blessing and God spoke directly to me. It's funny how that happens. Today's teaching was about words. How powerful words are and how it takes so many kind words to build someone up, but it takes so few, even just one perhaps, to cut someone so deep.
Pastor Andrew had everyone write down words that have been said to you that have cut you so deep and have changed you and affected you so negatively. Words like useless, worthless, ugly, fat.... etc. We wrote them down and during communion, we all put the notecards into a shredder at the foot of the cross and picked up a new notecard from the cross. We were trading our sorrows and our shame for the good of the Lord. (Yes, we sang that song during worship). The new card says this: "For we are God's masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things He planned for us long ago." Ephesians 2:10
This was only the second time I have attended this church. My heart is torn between two churches, and I truly can't decide which one to call home. But that's a whole other story. I felt pretty dumb though at this service. I didn't really care, but afterwards I laughed at myself, thinking, no one is going to want to be friends with the new weirdo girl in the third row who bawled the whole service. haha. Whatever. The teaching was just SO refreshing to me and it hit my current situation spot on. I was able to let go of those hurtful words and know that they are not true. And that God's word is truth and He says I am His masterpiece.
The other part of the teaching this morning though, was not just about words that have affected YOU, but also about the words WE use towards others. He asked us what kind of word diet are WE on and what words do you allow in your vocabulary. Are they words that build people up or cut them down?
Luke 6:45 says this:
A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.
People often talk about others needing a tongue replacement because of the harsh, angry and hurtful words they speak, but Luke is telling us different. The mouth speaks what the heart is full of. Is your heart full of anger? or Hurt? or Joy? It is not a tongue transplant we need, but rather a heart transplant. If your heart is full of love, your mouth will speak loving words. God is love. Fill your heart with the Lord.
This was so powerful to me this morning (well, it still is.....) I realize that in the midst of my anger, I don't always use loving words either. This is yet another reason why I need the Lord to renew my heart each day. This why I need to cling to this verse:
2 Corinthians 4:16
Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day.
So thank you, Pastor Andrew, for your amazing words today. Just the thing I need. And thank you, Lord, for speaking to me so clearly today.
I was able to get out of the house today and go visit my family. This was also refreshing. It had been over a month since I had seen them, when before the move, I saw them at least once a week. I even enjoyed my drive (despite KaeLee crying for half of the drive home). I was able to really soak in the words that were spoken today and was able to sing along to my worship music and truly enjoy being in God's presence.
Shawn stayed home today and when I got home, I found the desk from the office in our bedroom. I am not sure what to make of this yet. He was so adamant yesterday about the office not being turned into one of the girls' bedrooms. He was sleeping when I got home, so I have to wait till tomorrow to figure this out. I was not set on separating the girls and merely mentioned the idea, but now that he has moved the office, I can't really tell him 'nevermind, I'll figure it out' can I? Hmmmmm....... I just don't know what to do. I know exactly what he will say if I say anything negative about it though. He'll say "I can't please you. You complain that the girls don't sleep well in the same room and when I move the desk for you, you complain about that too." Argh. Why is communication so hard?!?!
For now, I must go to bed. Two late nights in a row...... Ahhhhh!!! Hopefully we wore the girls out well enough today that they will sleep in for me tomorrow! :) What a treat that would be. If not, I may just have to join them during nap time! Goodnight y'all. My new heart and I are hitting the hay.
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