Grandma Betty Bechard

1:30am on Saturday morning, February 5th, Grandma Bechard passed away. 

It's a blessing, really.  She has been fighting cancer for so long now and the last year or so has been the hardest on her.  And the family.  It's a weight lifted off the family, knowing that she is finally safe in the arms of Jesus, free of pain, free of suffering and filled with pure JOY.  I obviously can't speak from experience, but I imagine no greater feeling than that of running into the arms of JESUS!  The joy and the love of the Lord is flooding her right now as she has danced into eternity!

I ask for prayers for my family right now as they begin this road of the unknown and this upcoming year of "firsts".  The first Easter without her.  The first mothers day, birthdays, family get-togethers, vacations, Christmas, Thanksgiving, all the other holidays and special events.  Each Tuesday night, as that was the night my aunt and step mom would go to grandmas.  It's a tough year ahead of them.  Each passing year will bring a little less pain, but the first year is the hardest.  I ask for prayers that the Lord will allow them to find JOY and HOPE and TOGETHERNESS.  Let this loss not tear the family apart, but bring them closer.  Let this loss not create bitterness, but sweetness.  Let this family laugh as they remember what a special lady she was. 

I have been blessed to have 4 grandmas.  I have been not-so-blessed to now have lost 3 of them.  I have been down this road before.  The loss is never less of a loss.  Just different.  I'm not worried about myself.  I have a blessed gift from God in being able to deal with death with a smile.  I've never been one to cry at funerals or cry over death.  My heart fills with JOY.  Some people have told me that that is morbid.  I really have to be careful when I am around those who have just lost a loved one.  Even if it is someone who I have lost also.  It is easy for me to smile and laugh and enjoy the moment.  Of course there are internal moments of sorrow, but they are quickly overcome with joy when I think about the reality of the situation.  I try to be respectful to those mourning, but I cannot produce tears on purpose.  I cry at irrational things, not what everyone else cries about.  I will, however, cry if I see others crying.  I don't cry for the same reason they are crying, I cry because my heart aches for them.  I am a good empathizer. 

But I do want people to know that just because I don't cry, doesn't mean I have a heart made of stone.  It's just the opposite.  I have a heart of HOPE.  It's not a goodbye.  It's a goodbye for now.  Perhaps this act will change if it's my own child or my husband, but I'm not so sure.  I remember back to when Hannah fell down the stairs and my mom asked me if I cried.  I didn't.  I was shaking beyond belief, but I didn't cry.  She didn't believe me.  I don't expect her to.  I don't expect anyone to believe me when I talk about me not crying.   It's not normal.  I know that.  But like I said, it's a GIFT. 

Anyway, sorry for all the babble.  Again, I just ask that prayers go out to my family right now.  Especially for my Grandpa.  I'm curious to see how he handles it.  At the funeral today he was very smiley and seemed his happy self.  But I know he's already lonely.  Watching two other grandpas go through this grief has been interesting.  Both of them have completely changed.  And not necessarily for the better.  One used to be a HUGE family man and now does nearly nothing with the family.  He has a new wife and spends time with her and her family.  Perhaps his own family his a constant reminder of his late wife.  I don't know.  The other grandpa withdrew and hardly ever leaves the house.  The family is not the same anymore.  Which is why I ask for so many specific prayers for this side of my family.  Thank you in advance.

Don't be afraid, for I am with you. Don't be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.
Isaiah 41:10

This was her obituary taken from the Yakima Herald Newspaper:

YAKIMA - The Lord called Betty Jean (Ream) Bechard home on Saturday, February 5, 2011. A loving Wife, Mother, Grandmother, Great Grandmother and Sister, Betty lost her courageous eight-year battle with cancer. She fought this merciless and ravaging disease the same way she fought all challenges in life: with unfathomable strength, love and perseverance. Even during this battle, she continued to assist and comfort others in any way possible as well as nurturing her love of crocheting, Yakima Bears and Seattle Mariners baseball. Her jovial personality, home-made crafts and fresh baked goods will be missed by family and friends alike! Prior to her passing, she was honored by the Holy Redeemer Church Holy Name Society for her many years of dedication and service to the parish and its parishioners. It went on to say "your strength and ongoing trials are an inspiration to us all." Betty dedicated her life to three principles: family, faith and friends. She loved and guided her children; she loved the Lord unwaveringly; and she selflessly served anyone in need. She was loved by all.

Betty is survived by: her loving husband of 60 years, Marvin Bechard; her children Dennis, Darrell (Vickie), Pam Beaudry (Mike), David (Anna), Brenda Young (David) and Michelle Gonzales (Jeff); her brother Jerry Ream (Dianne); 17 grandchildren; and 28 great-grandchildren.

Special thanks to Dr. Brady and Associates for their superb care and friendships. A very special thanks to Sheila of Memorial Hospice, a true professional and friend who made herself feel like a member of our family. Donations in Betty's name may be made to Memorial Hospice.

Visitation will be from 4:00 p.m. to 8:00 p.m., Tuesday, February 8, 2011 at Holy Redeemer Catholic Church with a Vigil starting at 6:00 p.m. Mass of Christian Burial will be 10:00 a.m., Wednesday, February 9th also at the church. Private inurnment will be at Calvary Cemetery at a later date. Arrangements are under the care and direction of Keith & Keith Funeral Home.